Are you speaking life to your husband?

My luck would have it that the night before I start getting up a bit earlier is the worst night ever. Anyone else have that kind of luck? My goal was to be up at six this morning, but my daughter had other intentions. My almost-four-year-old decided that she absolutely would not sleep last night. She also decided that there was no reason for her parents to sleep either. So Will and I were up until 4am with a child who was exhausted and crying because she was exhausted, yet could not or would not sleep.

Guess who DID NOT get up at six? ME.

I did, somehow, manage to read a little bit of the Bible today. And by a little bit, I mean ONE verse. And it made me think about my marriage.

“The tongue can bring death or life; those who love to talk will reap the consequences.”      Proverbs 18:21

If you ever met my husband, you’d understand. He is kind. He is funny. He works so hard to take care of us and he does an amazing job. He strives to be Godly. He doesn’t say things that could hurt people’s feelings. He doesn’t sweat the small stuff. He is the complete opposite of me.

I am a control freak. I tend to do things myself so they get done “the right way.” I don’t like to be told what to do because I feel like that person is saying I’m incapable. I freak out over tiny things like taking the wrong route to our destination. Yes, I know.

One of the MANY reasons I need God’s grace. 

So I read this verse as I wondered, “Am I speaking life or death to my husband?” I immediately knew the answer. Every day I make certain I tell him how much I love him. How much I need him. How super sexy he is. (Yep. I said it.) And that he is a good man.

Then he does something differently than I would, and my emotions take over. Why doesn’t he listen to me? I’ve told him a million times. Doesn’t he care? Didn’t he pay enough attention to me over the past six years to notice how it’s supposed to be done? And here’s the problem with that.

He hasn’t done anything wrong. 

In reading this today, I had to really make a decision. Do I speak life into my husband or do I speak death? Do I encourage him or tear him down. It really is that simple, that black and white.

I choose to be the one who builds him up. I choose to allow God to speak through me. I choose to be to my husband everything he has been to me. 

It’s amazing to me how God can speak to us in two minutes worth of reading the Word. What did you get out of your quiet time today?
Love to my loves,


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